Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor may very well be the last food processor you will need to buy. This marvel of engineering impresses guests and passerbys without being plugged in to the wall. A conversation piece in itself the processing goes well beyond the food.

Dogs will get jealous of the new appliance. Cats will try to sleep in it. Fish will.. well.. soil their bowl and wait expectantly for you to clean it up. The Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor may not immediately address every issue in the house. It will, however, distract you from them those problems. Unless you have black mold growing in the walls this may be the best approach to take. Besides – we’ve got some homemade breads and butters to spin out! Leaky roofs can wait.

The Distractingly Sleek Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor

Much like myself this food processor is tough on food but easy on the eyes. Sporting an attention grabbing stainless steel motor base with perfect symmetry this food processor commands the attention of the room. This food processor keeps eyes up and off the floor better than a casino rug. You may not have to sweep for weeks.

Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor Storage

Storing this food processor is easy. It fits nicely on the counter in straight lines of vision from all entry points. If the counter is unavailable you can store your Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor in an illuminated trophy case or on a custom made shelf adorning the wall alongside family portraits.

Capacity of 14 cups. FOURTEEN.

Imagine, if you will, a food processor that can crank out 3.5 quarts of product. We are talking just shy of a gallon here folks. For context a gallon is a serving of ice cream.

The 5 layer cake machine

The Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor produces 5 layers of cake at a time
The Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor produces 5 layers of cake at a time

According to Cuisinart this behemoth processor can make 4 pounds of cake batter which is the equivalent of five 8-inch layer cakes. According to me this processor can make 1 8-inch 5 layer cake. Layers are only good in multiples so let’s just cut to the chase here.

Imperial scale clarification

For those of you who refuse to accept the imperial scale 14 cups is equivalent to 3,312.24 of your precious milliliters. And for you imperialists that equates to 3.12 liters. 3 liters is 1.5 times the size of those 2 liter bottles of RC you pick up from the circle K down the street. Although it may feel like this paragraph has spun out into some sort of SAT question take comfort in knowing that there is no right answer here.

It is a lot of space though

14 cups is a large capacity for any at-home food processor. 14 cups is a large capacity for any food processor outside on the sidewalk as well.

Now that we are all on the same page: certainly some ingredients will require a little space to work with. In the same way that you shouldn’t fill every inch of your living room with furniture you need a little space for processing some foods as well. For instance Cuisinart recommends using only 3 cups for nuts if creating your own butters. But if wiping homemade peanut butter off the ceiling is the risk we’re dealing with then you are better off pushing the limits to see how far it can go. Try this at your own risk – it could be a blade or motor issue.. but my money is on the peanut butter genie.

720 watts of pure unadulterated power

The beautiful design of this food processor is matched only by it’s amazing power. With 720 watts under the hood the Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor has more than enough juice to work the high capacity loads and perform the labor intensive processes like kneading dough and drowning out your kids voices during an argument.

The Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor's 720 watts is enough to drown out the kids.
720 watts is enough to drown out the kids.

Easy to use the Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor

With simple pedal-like switches including “on” and “off – pulse” the operation of this food processing workhorse is simple and intuitive and can be done while cranking out riffs on your electric guitar. Gone are the days of requiring the headspace to remember the differences between variant speeds like those of “chop”, “blend” and “liquify”.

Cleaning up is a breeze

Just have your kids do it. When they protest remember the 720 watt motor whirring above their squeaky little voices will help to dispel their grievances. Your kids will enjoy the fact that all of the parts, save for the motor base, can go directly into the dishwasher. If you don’t have a dishwasher then perhaps this food processor shouldn’t be thing you’re looking to purchase. Having said that it is the perfect appliance to ride the counter and draw attention away from the missing dishwasher. Just don’t use it too much. Like china in the display case.

Can’t quite cut the cheese

Verified Amazon purchasers of the Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor noted that the machine had difficulty cutting and grating cheeses. The manual does also warn never to try to process cheeses that are too hard to cut with a knife as this could damage the blade.

On the soft side of cheeses the purchaser is warned never to try to slice soft cheese like mozzarella or hard cheese like Parmesan. Soft cheeses should only be chopped in the processor except mozzarella that has been chilled first. But when it comes to shredding cheese it is better to stick with chilled semi-soft up through room temperature hard cheeses. Slicing is only recommended for semi-hard cheeses that have been chilled.

And in closing our Haiku Review of the Cuisinart custom 14 cup food processor

Fourteen cups go in
Enough to feed an army
An army of one

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *